So much pain for someone so young..

 I truly respect the people who stay strong even if they have every right to break down. I have very high respect for them because I know how painful it is to hold it all in the inside while it is all coming apart at the seams. It is the emotional battle that you have on the inside, the confusion, and the testing of how far your spirit will go that makes it tougher when you began to question if things are really worth doing and sacrificing. I believe now that if you truly wanted to be successful in an endeavor that you choose, you must cultivate the right attitude to obey the correct principles. And for you to obey the correct principles, you must have an insurmountable amount of self control, patience, due diligence, perseverance, sacrifice and optimism to keep going when the going gets tough nor good. As I started my journey to become my best potential I have met so many challenges that I thought would never last.. But in every time that I'm on these very tough situation I always talk to myself to hold on a little longer, to analyze, to never give up, to learn from it, and to  hold on to the fact that nothing is permanent. Things might get better or worst, but nothing is surely permanent... Even the best shows has to end. That's life. Life as I know it. 

As of the present situation I still had three jobs. I work as marketing manager on the afternoon, a call center agent at night, and runs a little pack lunch business in the evening. All of this three jobs sounds so good in the ear but honestly, I can't tell if it's killing me or making me stronger.Scrambling and playing my role in each part requires a lot of maturity and patience to make things happen. But still, I don't have complain. Even though sometimes, I might have a feeling of the need to get away from this place, to run and never look back, I still choose to hold on because I still believe that I AM VERY VERY BLESSED indeed. This is the path that i chose to discover my individuality and to reach my best potential. I will continue to plant seeds that will benefit others as it grows.. I will grow stronger from the pain.. and I will continue fight, conquer, and thrive. I'll never forget my very purpose in life, I came to win.. to survive, to prosper and to rise. ♥

So as I end my journal for today let me share the sweet little experience that happened earlier.. This sweet disposition was disposed as I went to my office mate's cubicle Andie.  He then told me sincerely with a smile and said.. "You know what Divyne, I always want to see you every morning.. because your spirit is just so positive and you radiate a very strong feeling of gratefulness in life even though we all know that your life must be very very hard on your age." That made my day! He is just so sweet and that just really uplift me! It made me smile. :) My manager David, also gave me a tight hug.. It was very refreshing and encouraging. He is just so sweet and warm.. I love my job. I love my life.. I love my family and I love my friends.. and even though I may love a man that I could never have,  mess up. a lot and lost things fast, that's okay.. nobody's perfect. There are no mistakes.. just chances we've taken.. I have learned. And I am growing everyday with the wisdom to live a happy and purposeful life. And even though I'm so broke inside and you don't see my pain, it doesn't mean it's not there. The pain is still there, but who cares? I'm a Sojourner! It's all water going under the bridge. And even though there so much pain for someone so young like me, I'll hide it all with a smile, stand tall, and wear those pumps! And Oh, Babe, don't get me wrong.. I'm tough. And so finally my ride is here! Got to go! bye bye loves! We may have not meet but thanks for getting a peek of my life as of the moment. I hope you feel my love and learn from my experiences.. love love love you, Divyne :*